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[futures_of_ash]

Another day of uneasy sleep and bouts of utter blackness. It's so very strange to actually sleep, when her life has only been punctuated by true unconsciousness as her only release. Sleeping is nice, when it deeps. But many times she half rouses, her mind linking sounds and half formed worries into nightmares that would be far more upsetting if she didn't immediately slipback into deeper rest.

Exhaustion as a shield. How convenient.

She's awake now though, her body tensing immediately before she opens her eyes and once more carefully takes in the scenery.

Still the medlab. Still the same bed. Still the tubes and wires.

No chains.

It's a wonderful way to wake up any day, right?

Comments

[prince-arithon.livejournal.com]

Arithon, however, is still there. A little ragged around the edges, but still there. Except for brief periods of personal hygeine, he's been there constantly.

[futures_of_ash]

She knew he was there, how not? But it's almost a shock to see him physically. Her green eyes widen slightly, worried immediately. ::Ari?:: she called softly into his swells of music.

[prince-arithon.livejournal.com]

::Good morning, Rachel.::

He responds, quirking his lips at her,

::Do you need aught?::

[futures_of_ash]

She's not certain it's morning, but she'll take his word for it. ::No, nothing:: she has no appetite, she won't for a while yet in all likelyhood.

::You haven't left...:: there's so much gratitude in that statement, but also deep, deep fear. She won't have her friends wearing away because of her weakness.

[prince-arithon.livejournal.com]

::I have not.::

He agrees, pushing her hair back gently,

::Bianca understands. She is counting money.::

[futures_of_ash]

::You should rest:: she knows better than to say sleep. They once discussed nightmares...and she knows how very little she slept because of them.

::Please?:: it wouldmake her feel better, somewhat. She knows it'll be hard to keep herself out of the midst of the terror and fear when he goes...but she won't beg for death again, she knows that much.

And he should rest.

[inquisitivehero]

A Hank wanders by, sorta casually.

"Good evening, Rachel."

he taps the monitors and examines the results before turning to her.

"How are oyu?"

[futures_of_ash]

The curled figure doesn't respond for a moment, just lifts haunted eyes towards the sounds his fiddling makes. The curled position probably isn't good for all the things holding her together right now, but she can't really help it. not truly.

And, oddy, there's almost no recognition in that gaze, nothing but evaluation...is he a threat?

[inquisitivehero]

His eyes widen and he sends, in his mind, Rachel? are you okay? What's wrong?, and underneath is Lovefriendshipprotectioncare.

[futures_of_ash]

If he were a telepath, his thoughts woudl have been torn to shreds on the glas sin her mind, doused deeply in the dark thoughts that she dwelled within for the non. As it is though, it just seems to not reach her. Her muscles ar tense, despite her huddle...

And the heart monitor? Such a steady, deadly steady beep.

[inquisitivehero]

He blinks and moves closer, slowly, hands raised to the sides.

"Rachel? Do you remember me? It's Hank."
And the words are echoed in his mind.

[futures_of_ash]

"Do you remember me?

Oh yes, you do.

How could you forget m'dear?

You wanted to didn't you?

I thought as much."

It's probably not suprising, to one who's seen Rachel move. She moves well...simply because she wills it so. Fluid, garceful, and very veyr bad for a wounded body.

There's IV needles dripping slowly on the floor now, and a shrilling monitor proclaims her dead, but she's upright and almost across the room, watching him now.

[futures_of_ash]

She almost hides behind Archie as she comes back in the door, but she doens't. She lost herself again, she'll handle the consequences. She does settle gratefully back on her bed once more. Certainly she lokos a little worse for wear, but she's alright for awhile...

Hank will probably dissagree and point out bloody bandages, but she's far more worried about mental, after all, it's her mind that kills.

She's happy to leave enough room for Archie and his tray at one end of the bed though, after all, he comes bearing gifts...

[prone-to-panic.livejournal.com]

Or gift at least. It is a sizeable package, wrapped in soft red paper and tied with a gold ribbon. He hands it to her and sets about making her a cup of tea, even if she only holds the warm cup, it will do her good.

"One lump or two?"

Inside the package is a cloak (http://mystictor.net/prodimages/BlueIvorycloak.jpg), woven through with spells of warmth and durability. Rachel's is silk velvet, the sort of color that seems to shift between all the colors of fire with the slightest movement, embroidered with delicate patterns in glimmering gold thread.

[futures_of_ash]

Tea is a gift to. She lived in Britain for a little while. She liked tea, as long as someone else made it. She could burn water, and often had. ::One please:: she asked politely, poking at the ribbon for a moment.

After a time she admitted to herself that her fingers weren't going to thank her for being forced to move enough to actually unwrap the gift, so she undid the bindings with teke, letting the wash of cloth pool across her lap like a cheery hearth fire.

And she stared.

It was beautiful...

And it hurt to see, so very much. To be reminded, again, of that piece of her soul she'd lost...

And yet she can't help but run a hand over the shimmering cloak and let the tears fall ::Oh Archie...it's amazing::

[prone-to-panic.livejournal.com]

Perhaps if she can't wrap herself in the flames in truth right now, she can at least wrap up in their memory.

"It reminded me of you when I saw it."

The tea is passed over. Bar makes very good tea, and it is generally supposed to be a good idea to put small liquid type things on one's stomach at first. Today tea, tomorrow parhaps juice, and then who knows? Maybe soon they will work up to broth. It is, unfortunately, a process that Archie is all too familliar with.

[futures_of_ash]

Memory can be one of the most painful things in life....but rather hurt and remebering flame than forget it. Never forget it. Ithad been among the first to truly accept her, that flame and it's giver. To love her whole, and as herself.

::I'll treasure it:: how could she not?

She holds the cup in both hands, like a child would, lifting carefully to sip, just a sip...and it hurts, heat running down her damaged throat, and she coughs, oh yes. Coughs reflexively, involuntarily, her body taking over from her mind. She half expects blood with those bubling,racking coughs...

But blessedly there's none. And she sips again with less effect. It's good tea after all...and Bar does so love to give Rachel Broth.

[prone-to-panic.livejournal.com]

He reaches for her as she coughs, and he remembers coughing the blood, they are her memories and they are his memories. He takes a deep breath.

"Slowly... Wouldn't do to hurt yourself more."

[inquisitivehero]

It is perhaps an hour latewr when Hank comes in, thee are flecks of snow on his fur ad he come sin, looking distraught and then... stopping as he sees her. His expression is one of a combination of fear, anger, frustartion, dissappointment, and relief, all rolled into one. He stands there for a long time looking at her, then heaves a sigh and comes over.

"Are you okay?"

[futures_of_ash]

And she winces slightly but doesn't hide, no, doesn't hide. She screwed up, she'd never hidden from that. ::No:: it's honest and forthright.

::But I'm closer to stable::

Oddly, there seems to be stars above her bed, a vast array of them, better than any window, that.

[inquisitivehero]

He sighs again, a long drawn out breathe.

"I am glad you are more...stable."

And there is true gladness in his voice as well as a deep fondness when he looks at her.

"Will you allow me to cleanse you,check you out, bandage you, and hook you up again?"

It is a simple question given from one adult to another. An acknowdlegement, perhaps, that he will not force her to do this, no matter how he feels.

[futures_of_ash]

She hangs her head a moment and draws a deep breath, drawing a folded cloak from the edge of the bed and stroking the fabric for reassurance or strength. ::I can't promise that I won't forget again, that I won't slip...::

She looks up once more to meet his gaze ::But for now, yes. And I'll do my best in the future::

[inquisitivehero]

He nods.

"I cant ask anything more of you, Rachel, and I wont."

he cocks his ehad and his mind starts to work.

"For now, I would put you back in a similar situation as before, but...given time, I could rig the attachements as less intrusive and also with a relase, allowing you to unhook, so to speak, now and then to go for a 'walk'... it would take a day or two rto work out the kinks but I could do it..."

He grins at her.

"I want you to be as comfortable as possible, Rachel."

[futures_of_ash]

She simply sits, as calmly as she can, and nods. She's holding still...

::That would be nice:: she admitted. The ability towandr, yes, that would be a very good idea. And would go a long way to helping settle her without panic.

::Are you alright?::

[futures_of_ash]

::They do their best to make sure we remember them don't they?::

Hank's going to yell at her for the excessive movement, but she's hugging him and that's that. If tea would help this deep, soul scarred cold she would insist he drink. If blankets wrapped tightly could thaw the chill, she'd give him the bed and gladly.

::Gaunt was not my first master:: she confided, starting on her trade, to distract, to help now.